Radical or Insane ? Insights from a Political Flyer

It’s interesting how words can change over time.

Growing up in the 1980’s, it was common to hear words like “awesome” and “radical” used to describe things in a positive light. Seen a good movie? “That was awesome.” Experience something unexpectedly great, like the very first listen through Van Halen’s eponymous debut album? “That band is radical, man.”

My how times have changed.

Yesterday, some stealthy neighborhood ninja stuffed a political ad under my doormat. As a registered independent voter in a blood-red county in Colorado, I was interested to learn more about any candidate who could surreptitiously slip a scrap of paper on my doorstep without setting off the Ring doorbell that lets me know when a bird lands on the house across the street.

This is the actual flyer, showing both the front and back.

There’s a lot to unpack here, so grab a cup of coffee and let’s take this step by step:

STOP Joe Biden, Nancy Pelosi, and the far left’s radical agenda

Which “radical” agenda would that be, exactly? The agenda that says that all people should be treated equally, regardless of skin color or gender or who they choose to love? Or maybe it’s the agenda of providing equal opportunities for all Americans, regardless of party affiliation? Maybe she wants to stop that “radical” thinking about preventing kids from getting killed at school? Or possibly she’s against that “radical” practice of taking a freakin’ global pandemic seriously and protecting each other from dying? Oh, I bet she must be talking about the “radical” plan of quality medical care without life-altering, crippling debt. Or maybe she’s against the radical plan of allowing a woman to make decisions about her own body. Yeah, she’s a conservative woman, that’s probably it.

If that’s the definition of radical, I’d rather be radical than “insane”. It’s insane to give AR-15s more rights than women. It’s insane to brutally mistreat people because of their skin color or who or how they love. It’s insane — nay, sociopathic — to put the needs of oneself over the needs of others. It’s insane to do all of this and claim it’s a matter of religion, when in truth the foundations of that religion align more closely with these “radical” ideas.

FIGHT for the Trump Agenda

Holy crap, now what agenda is that? Is it the agenda where he desperately wants to be the Most High Lord of America? Or maybe it’s the agenda where everyone looks the other way while he commits high crimes and treason against America and the world? Perhaps she wants to fight for the agenda of downplaying a GLOBAL PANDEMIC leading to the death of hundreds of thousands of innocent people, many of whom trusted him to their graves.

Or maybe it’s about the economy. Certainly, as a self-proclaimed (and yet unproven) billionaire, certainly Trump has the skills to build a strong economy, right? Well, as the former President he gave tax breaks to the wealthy and subsidized it with taxes on everyone else.

But, you say, he graciously gave $1200 checks to everyone out of his unfailing mercy! Yeah, about that… Dig a bit deeper and you’ll see that while he gave you $1200, he gave business owners a 10% tax break that saved companies like mine far, far more. My business is ridiculously small; I cannot imagine the impact that 10% tax break had on his own businesses. Or, to be honest, what impact it could have had if he actually paid taxes!

If you don’t pay taxes, you go to jail. If Trump doesn’t pay taxes, you call him a “stable genius”.

Make it make sense.

FPOTUS’ mishandling of the pandemic led to the most destructive economic decline in recent history, and his Machiavellian immigration policies led to the separation of children from their parents, leaving some to die in cages.

He never quite understood how tariffs (or hurricanes, eclipses, steps, or water) work, but damn he could hold a Sharpie (or porn star) even when he couldn’t hold a cogent conversation.

Ms. Candidate, you have been bamboozled. Trump is a grifter, a con man, a petty thief with a long and checkered history of doing very bad things with very bad people. Now he’s taken classified documents and left them unsecured in his resort while entertaining potential future enemies. How much treason does it take to get an orange man in an orange jumpsuit?

Even the best authors would never write a character this vile; one person with all these flaws would not be believable in the context of any story. Yet, this is not a story. Instead, it’s merely a small sample of the depravity that lies within the standard bearer of the Republican party.

Of all the problems in America, she wants to FIGHT for … that.

Make it make sense.

DEFEND the Second Amendment

This one is interesting because the second amendment isn’t under attack. Women are under attack, which I would think Ms. Candidate, a woman, would notice.

The “radical” left wants to protect children from having their bodily organs splattered on other kids simply because some lunatic with a semi-automatic rifle decided that today is the day they’re going to try to get on the news. Sure, Ms. Candidate, you and your ilk pass along “thoughts and prayers” as if you care, but the reality is that as long as the gun lobby keeps padding your pockets, you’ll protect weapons far more than you’d ever protect a citizen.

Making this even more egregious, Ms. Candidate, there are those in your party calling for the killing of members of the opposing party, not because those people are bad people, but because of how they VOTE. What you fail to realize is that this is exactly the rationale that CAUSES school shootings. When a kid feels put down or feels like everyone disagrees with them, they arm up and the killings begin. What kind of insane, fascist, bully ‘pro-f***ing-life” party believes that it’s okay to kill other people because they disagree? What ever became of rational discourse and debate? It’s impossible to debate someone who comes to the discussion prepared to KILL YOU.

The second amendment is not under attack. SCHOOL CHILDREN ARE. We’ve recognized your thoughts and prayers and repeatedly it has been proven that yours is an ineffective strategy. So as the definition of insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different outcome, let’s stop being insane and try something else for a change, shall we?

STOP illegal immigration — build the wall

Oh, you mean the wall that Mexico is paying for? That wall? The wall that was never even close to finished, the wall that cost taxpayers an insane amount of money that is falling down in several areas? The wall that stopped LITERALLY NOBODY from coming in? That wall?

The left and right both agree that illegal immigration needs to be addressed. We need a clear path to come into this country legally and a clear and concise path to become a citizen. Neither party has made much progress in this area, and it’s regrettable. But, Ms. Candidate, building a wall is the solution?

Once again you have failed to see the grift. You were bamboozled. There never was a “caravan” of immigrants coming to take American jobs. Trump’s wall has provided zero security, except for maybe job security for fear-mongering Faux News hosts. And while I have no evidence for this claim, I am confident that when all the information is known, it will come to light that much of the funding for the wall probably went into the pocket to one Donald J. Trump, professional con man.

CRIMINALIZE fentanyl

I don’t know enough about this topic specifically to offer anything salient, but isn’t the point of illegal drugs is that they’re ALREADY illegal? Isn’t it also true that if you’re a white person caught with illegal drugs you’re more likely to get a slap on the hand and released than someone whose skin is a different color?

The issue here isn’t making something a crime, the issue is prosecuting the breaking of existing laws fairly and without prejudice. Yet, in America, “God helps you when you’re white.” It’s a travesty that a white kid can take a gun into a protest and kill people and get off scot-free while a black man gets a knee to the neck until he is dead over cigarettes.

Maybe fentanyl is one problem. But the bigger problem is the miscarriage of justice in prosecuting people not for the crime, but for the color of their skin.

STOP any tax increases

You gotta love the underline. I think what you’re saying, Ms. Candidate, is that you will fight the attempts by that “radical” left to get your campaign contributors to pay a fair share. Certainly, those poor, misunderstood billionaires that funnel buckets of cash into your donation bucket must be protected at all costs, right?

I’m calling BULLSHIT.

If you really care about making America “great”, then by God you might want to listen to Jesus and start noticing “the least of these”. While you and your sycophant cronies pad your pockets with piles of donor money, there are real life Americans literally starving and dying. Actual people are getting evicted because they’ve been bankrupted by the for-profit medical establishment. Churches collect BILLIONS of dollars in donations and pay ZERO in taxes. That’s fair to you? You oppose billionaires paying a fair share to the country that provides the infrastructure they have leveraged to amass ridiculous wealth? You oppose someone paying a tax bill that will reduce their cache of money by such a miniscule amount that they will still die with more money than most of the rest of the population combined, while other Americans DIE?

How can anyone be so heartless? It’s insane!

NOW TO THE BACK SIDE!

Frankly, the back of this flyer is more of the same equine excrement from the front, basically reinforcing that this candidate has no particular platform other than opposing people who want to make everyone’s lives better. But I do want to draw your attention to one particular point of interest — right at the top of the page:

THE CONSERVATIVE FIGHTER WHO WINS

Ms. Candidate has shown us here that her politics are not about doing anything practical; it’s not about helping people, or even being a good person. It’s about winning, any and all costs be damned. She’s letting us know that she has no actual plan to help anyone, but dammit she’ll work to oppose those “radical” leftists who want equality, affordability, freedom, and opportunity for everyone… even Republicans.

Finally, notice the photos on the front and the back. There must be a good 20 years (or 20 hours of Photoshop) between those pictures. So who exactly is running? The 30 year old or the 50 year old? A blonde or a redhead? Perhaps she’s a redhead that felt more like her true self as a blonde so she transitioned?

In the overall scheme of things these issues are inconsequential, but it does smack a bit of hypocrisy for a member of a party that is all about “truth” and “transparency”.

Or maybe she put these photos in to help us better understand that everything she and her party stands for is untrue. A grift. INSANE.

SIGN UP. DONATE.

No, I don’t think I will. Ms Candidate, and you should be ashamed.

I now understand how your flyer got on my doorstep without setting off the Ring doorbell. It doesn’t typically see leeches.

Friends, in a few short months Americans will be going to the ballot box to cast votes that will shape America one way or another. Every vote matters. If you would be so kind, I would appreciate you sharing this story with everyone you know. Use this to encourage them to vote to support candidates who support these positively radical ideas of equality, fairness, decency, opportunity, and freedom for everyone equally.